Malted Chocolate Coffee Milkshake

I’m sick. It’s just a cold but I am not going to stop whining about it until I can stop coughing. When I’m sick, I have all the maturity and stoicism of an exhausted four-year-old. And I wanted a milkshake.

You can see where this is going. I do have a milkshake making contraption. Mr. B’s mother gave it to us years ago and it’s been collecting dust in three different kitchens all that time. But today I thought, how hard can it be?

So I made a milkshake. A proper, grown-up malt with dark chocolate and fantastic coffee ice cream.

It is not what I was craving. I wanted a Wendy’s frostie like my mom used to get me after the orthodontist tortured my poor teeth. I wanted a too-sweet vanilla concoction like Mr. B sometimes picks up for me at Braum’s after a bad day. I made a great milkshake. I just didn’t want a great milkshake. I wanted something less good prepared and brought to me by someone else.

Did I mention that sick me is also a world-class brat?

Anyway, if you are in the mood for a really good milkshake, here it is.

Ingredients (Serves one. No sharing.)

Start with a heaping cup of coffee ice cream. I mean heaping. Okay, let’s just call it a cup and a half.

1 1/2 cups coffee ice cream

1/2 cup whole milk

2 T chocolate malt powder

1 T cocoa powder


Combine all ingredients in a milkshake making contraption (or a blender. A blender would probably work.) . . .

. . .and mix.

Keep mixing until it’s a nice uniform consistency.


Pour into your favorite goblet (Oh come on, I go to the renaissance fair at least twice when it’s in town. Of course I have a goblet.) and top with a dark chocolate coated malt ball (or whopper) and dig around your cabinets until you find a straw. You can’t drink a milkshake without a straw. It’s illegal.

The day’s second dose of Nyquil is kicking in, so you have to wait until I feel better to find out the abominable things I cooked last night. I’m not proud. But they were yummy. You’ll see.


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  1. #1 by Lynda Kayes on June 17, 2011 - 12:01 PM

    I’ve decided you have a peanut butter fetish! Looked at the key lime pie recipe again, having people for burgers on Father’s Day thinking key lime pie is perfect, especially since I get to keep the leftovers. They had key limes in the market today trying to decide bottle juice vs the real thing??

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